Super Dad

 Sometimes I just don't realize how much I try to be Super Dad. I found this out the other day during my weekly laundry encounter.

We do not own a modern load-and-leave washing machine, one that is peppered by buttons and has a mind of its own. Ours is the basic model that requires so much elbow grease for a really clean wash. Indeed, doing laundry in this house is one tough job.

Amazingly, as tough as it seems to be, in between this washing and rinsing contest I was able to prepare lunch, organized math and writing practice work for Carmella, checked her previous work, fix the bed, changed the sheets, wash the dishes, prepare the daughter for her bath, chat with her about recent discoveries, has set the table, watered the plants and do light dusting.

But in spite of the lack of focus on a particular task, my laundry will still turn out smelling clean and fresh. I must have been created to be good at this.

Recently my good friend Jon briefly experienced being in my situation. He is my biking mentor, my ride buddy and it was surprisingly enriching talking about housework with him while enjoying our favorite sport. I can sense his special joy in walking this particular mile for his family.

It was also during this time when I discovered that this man cooks a mean beef stew, something I would have not probably known if not for that moment of being in his zone when he did a Super Dad. A great mountain biker he is but being a good cook is a pleasant revelation. Indeed, we bring out the best that is in us when we give our best for others.

My brother in law once said that in his eyes I am a true hands-on dad and a morning of suds was all it took for me to really understand what he meant.

A lot of sacrifice is often needed to truly become a part of the weave called family. And perhaps, being a Super Dad, the one who covers as much as he can, the best he can while he can, is a route I am quite familiar with.

To all Super Dad's out there, may your tribe increase!

Photo Credit: www.superman-picture.com/logo/

Reflections

Carmella asked me the other day how long will it be when she turns 18.

I thought it will be good math exercise for her so we began counting the years, comparing the differences in age between her and her favorite cousins, and how old she needs to be before she starts trail riding with me. Homeschooling? Precisely.

Counting the years, however, also brings to mind the finite. As we were going over it, the math exercises made me reflect on my own mortality.

I will be turning 52 in a few months and Carmella 9 a month after me. It will be 9 more years when she turns 18 and perhaps another 8 when she gets married. The 9 may be a stretch but the next 8, if I make it that far, will be a milestone. It will be a great blessing to be there for that next 8 years.

Sadly, thinking about those numbers made me imagine what I might miss.

I may no longer be there during the best days of her life, when she begins fulfilling her dreams.

I may no longer be there when she deals with the stages of falling in love and then, finally, seeing her off to start a family of her own.

I may no longer be there to see her firstborn.

I may no longer be there to hear her children laugh, play with them, shower them treats and feel their love through their hugs.

I may no longer be there to tell them stories of their mom's courage as she fought Leukemia.

Sobering thoughts, really.

But sobering they may be, thoughts of the finite can also lead one to pursue a determined effort to treasure and make the most of what we have, of the time still at hand. Truly, they are more precious than gold.

I may only have the now, the now to cherish each and every moment Carmella is with me. But it will be my legacy, my gold.

Yes, mortality makes for even a greater reason to love, to make the most of life, to be forever thankful that I have what I have.

And making the most of my present I will.

Fiercely.

The Push

For the past week I was in a slump.

I was not thinking well.

I was feeling sorry for myself because my projects did not pan out as I hoped they would.

I had a hard time thinking of what to write in this blog, which is probably the consequence of the above.

I was not riding my bike as often as I want which really distressed me a lot.

And yesterday, I got my Electrocardiogram results. The doctor saw something that shouldn't normally be there and so requested an Echocardiogram. This compounded the sulking even more.

Yes, I was not a pleasant person to be with. Period.

Then this morning I came across a video of  the late Gabrielle Bouliane.

In the midst of all our heart aches and frustrations, truly, there is still so much to be thankful for.......

Photo credit: iiana@flicker